For as long as I can remember, I’ve had the same New Year’s Resolution: This year, I’ll write my book.
Last year, I made a new one (seeing as how that one had never worked): Next year, I will not have the same resolution.
And for the first time, my resolution actually came true. I did write my book, and no matter what happens (or doesn’t happen) as a result of that, I finally achieved my life’s goal. So I don’t need to have the same resolution I’ve had for my entire life…
Except that I want to say: This year, I’ll write another book. As much as things change, they stay the same.
I thought that once I wrote that first book, once I proved that I could actually do this, everything would fall into place and I would just write and write and never stop. That did not happen. Either because I feel pressure to “follow up” on my first project (in either tone, genre, or quality) or because whatever anomaly that first project struck, I can’t find it again… I’ve been as stuck as ever. Circling multiple ideas, unable to land on any of them.
I don’t want this year to be another year of whining and struggle. I want this year to be triumphant and successful, whatever those words ultimately mean. For me, it would mean getting up every day and writing with the same passion and joy I felt writing my first project. I refuse to believe that was a one-time fluke.
So, as always, in one form or another, my resolution is to write. I guess I’ve got a one-note life. 🙂